Thursday, July 15, 2010

{it's the end of the world as I know it.}

& I don't feel fine.
Yeah, I changed the words-whatev.
It's my blog & I do what I want.
{mostly.}

Lately, we have been fighting, Mr. H and I. Not the type of fighting that means anything. Just the type that happens when the other never cleans up after themselves, or leaves the cupboards open, the dirty dishes on the counter, dirty socks on the floor, lets the dogs run through the house with muddy feet, never putting the toilet seat down, muddy boots, laying on the couch when I am at work, every little thing that happens when your husband has been laid off for just under three weeks, and plans to be laid off until the middle of September. 

 So I nag. I am tired. I work full time. I get up at 5:10 and leave a sleeping husband in our nice warm, california king. I go to work. I smile for eight-ten hours. I am nice to people ALL DAY LONG. I come home to a mess. I come home to a very bored husband, that most of the time is acting like a teenager, whiney, hungry, bored. HONESTLY? You are TWENTY-TWO years old. Get off the couch. Turn off the tv. Do the dishes. Switch the laundry. Start dinner. Quit your bitching. You still have a job. You WILL be going back to work--in a month. You are NOT that bad off. We have to figure out a way to pay rent for ONE month, not six. CHILL OUT!

I am a little caught off gaurd by what he told me today--he wants a divorce. He is moving out this weekend. Last night he didn't come home. He stayed at his sisters. He and I had been fine, no major problems. He was helping his brother in law get his rental ready. He told me that we would go to dinner and a movie, I got off work, tired, hungry and ready to eat some good food. He wasn't going to be ready for awhile. It made me mad. I didn't want to wait around, he had made a big deal about hanging out and how we don't ever do anything. He wanted me to go home, get ready, then drive twenty minutes to pick him, go back home so he could get ready and then go to the movie and then dinner. I said No. I would just wait for him to get home whenever. He didn't call me until 9 somthing.
   
I went to a movie with a friend around 7:30. I was done. I didn't want to sit around anymore. He told me that all I do is cause fights, which I probablly do. But not for no reason. I am just so fed up with everything. If he wants out--then sweet- Go. But don't take all your money, go be stupid, and then come back when you are broke. Him walking away, leaves me a week before payday, two weeks before the house payment is due, and about 500 dollars in bills due. Not all of those will get paid- the house payment will be late because I cannot afford to pay it all by myself and I will have to probablly borrow money from my parents just to get back and forth to work and school.

  Grrr. I seriously hate him sometimes.